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Resident Evil: The Mercenaries 3D Demands Monogamy

No High Scores

It would appear that playing Resident Evil: The Mercenaries 3D ties you to the game for life in that there’s no way to delete your save games or start a new game from scratch. The only reason I can think of doing this is to prevent people from selling the game used. Either that or Capcom is a huge proponent of monogamy and they feel that once you play a game, you and that game should remain together forever. If it’s that first one, well, that’s Capcom’s prerogative, if it’s the second one, that’s just creepy. I can only hope that if there is no way to start a used game from scratch that the various used game retailers either stop taking the game in as trades or they inform the consumer what they’re getting into. While we’re on the subject of things that aren’t going to happen, I’d also really like a pony.

Seen at lots of places.

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Calendar Man – Week of 6/27

No High Scores

Usually I bemoan the lack of new releases over the summer, but this week I’m not complaining at all as my brain is still on vacation and I don’t feel like doing any work. Not that this is work, mind you, far from it. I live for new releases! They are the wind beneath my wings! Or, in this week’s case, the feeble gasp of a dying pigeon.

For the record, the deals also suck pigeon breath this week too.

New Releases
I saw Mystery Case Files: The Malgrave Incident at E3 and looked like a pretty enjoyable hidden object game. Nothing says “party” like inviting three other people over and hunting for a microscope for four hours.

Super Street Fighter IV: Arcade Edition is supposed to be the definitive edition of this game, so if you played the non-Arcade version, well, I don’t know how to say this nicely, but you suck. Luckily you can get the Arcade edition as a free update. The rest of us losers have to buy it, so that should make you feel better.

I have a theory that when the sun burns itself into a cinder and our planet is but a lifeless husk orbiting the remains of a dead star, somehow, some way, KOEI will still be making Dynasty Warriors games.

Resident Evil: The Mercenaries brings some zombie love to the 3DS with the third person horde mode thing-a-ma-bob from RE4 and RE5. The extra “d” in 3d stands for “dismemberment”.

If your workout plan isn’t getting you in the best shape needed to beat the ever-livin’ piss out of another human being, maybe give UFC Personal Trainer a try. A word of warning though, if this game is the only UFC training you undertake, I’d hold off on picking any bar fights.

Toys R Us – Get selects 3DS games for $15.99. Check store for full selection, but the ad shows Madden, Rayman 3D, Asphalt 3D, Combat of Giants: Dinosaurs 3D and Sims 3.

Target – Free $10 gift card with purchase of any Cars 2 game.

Best Buy – Buy UFC Personal Trainer for the 360 and get UFC Undisputed 2010 free.

Steam – Steam has Divinity II and Homefront for half off. They have other specials too, in the usual place.

Impulse – Impulse has Magicka and NFS Shift 2 Unleashed for half off. Their specials are also in the usual place.

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D&D: Daggerdale crashes onto PCs

Bill Abner is still up, up and away in his beautiful balloon but apparently he gets Wi-Fi up there. He sent me this press release a few minutes ago that starts with this line:

Hi William,

I wanted to share some great news with you!

OK, that sounds like the “great news” is that Bill has been selected to keep some Nigerian prince’s fortune in his personal back account. But it’s from Atari, not royalty. And the “great news” is that Dungeons and Dragons: Daggerdale is now available on PC. Our very own Brandon Cackowski-Schnell rated the game a dead zero and his pull quote resides at the rock bottom of the Metacritic listing. I played the demo and checked out early- and I love this kind of game. Press follows…take a look at the critics’ quotes they used. G4’s in particular is great. I hardly consider describing the gameplay to be “rallying around” the game. And “this is the way D&D was meant to be played”? Wow. Does making a statement like that get you an Atari paycheck?

The original standard for fantasy roleplaying is taking another step in its storied pop culture history as the Dalelands of the Forgotten Realms is brought to life for gamers and fantasy enthusiasts across the world. Atari, one of the worlds’s most recognized publishers and producers of interactive entertainment and Bedlam Games announced today the release of the highly anticipated Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale Windows PC Download.

Media have rallied around Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale’s console based hack and slash qualities in the RPG genre:

· “Daggerdale is a hack and slash loot fest…” – G4

· “At its heart, Daggerdale is all about dungeon crawling, baddie-bashing, and loot-scoring – and I don’t mean that in a derogatory way…” – RPGFan

· “Upon the lofty pedestal, you discover an ancient artifact known as the controller…” – GamesRevolution

· “…the way Dungeons & Dragons was always meant to be played.” – GamePro

Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale, a hack and slash action role playing game set in the deep mythology of the Forgotten Realms, is the first Dungeons & Dragons video game for connected consoles. Players are summoned by a mysterious mage and given the duty of defending their homeland as Rezlus, an evil Zhentarim Cleric looks to bring the power of the Black Lord Bane to Daggerdale. Restore order to the Dalelands by unlocking the secrets of the Mines of Tethyamar, defeating the evil within the treacherous Tower of the Void, leading to the final confrontation with Rezlus himself.

Players can take on the role of the melee expert Human Fighter, the quick and nimble Elven Rogue, the master of the arcane arts Halfling Wizard, and the powerful divine Dwarven Cleric. Gamers use intuitive pick-up-and-play combat combined with a wide assortment of weapons, feats and powers to defeat a wide range of deadly enemies. Players can level their character, unlocking three tiers of powers, and an extensive list of feats to create a truly unique character. As the player levels, they can add additional attribute points to their ability scores, further enhancing the performance of the character. The action-packed RPG gameplay allows for solo and co-op play for up to four players.

Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale carries a suggested Windows PC Download price of $14.99.

For more information, please log onto

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Bit.Trip Complete coming to Wii

Right on, another good news item that isn’t some nonsense like “new Call of Duty game announced!” or “Here’s screenshots from a game you can’t play until next year”. Aksys sent out press today announcing that their already announced Bit.Trip Saga compilation of all of Commander Video’s long-running indie series for the 3DS will be accompanied by a retail collection of the games for the quickly fading Wii. I’m planning on the 3DS version myself because I’ve actually not played these games yet and I think they’re likely a better fit on a handheld platform. Plus, this stuff could look really cool in 3D. But still, if you want to take the Wiimote out for one last waggle, this will probably be a fun- and colorful- option. Aksys’ take on it follows.

Aksys Games, a publisher of interactive entertainment software, in collaboration with game developer Gaijin Games, is pleased to officially reveal that in addition to BIT.TRIP SAGA on the Nintendo 3DS™ system, BIT.TRIP COMPLETE will be released on Wii™ as a complete six-game retail compilation, packaged with a BIT.TRIP Soundtrack Sampler audio CD. BIT.TRIP SAGA (Nintendo 3DS) and BIT.TRIP COMPLETE (Wii) will be shipping to retailers September 13, 2011.


All 6 games in the award-winning BIT.TRIP series in one complete package with 120 completely new BIT.TRIP challenges spanning all six games!
New audio gallery with fan remixes, original songs, and demo versions of existing BIT.TRIP themes!
An image gallery with exclusive production stills, concept art, and promo images!
A video gallery with more than 25 movies telling the story of CommanderVideo!
6 Letters to BIT.TRIP fans, written by the series’ director!
Original soundtrack CD packaged with BIT.TRIP COMPLETE featuring music from all six games in the series!
New difficulty modes in all games!
Online leaderboards!


– BIT.TRIP BEAT marks the beginning of CommanderVideo’s epic journey of the soul with:

o Crazy boss battles!
o Ultra-precise controls!
o A Crazy Chiptune-inspired soundtrack!
o Special Chiptune guest star Bit Shifter!
o Classic gameplay with brain-melting visuals!
o Intriguing cut scenes!

– BIT.TRIP CORE is the second installment in CommanderVideo’s soul quest with:

o Beautiful boss battles!
o Classic NES-style controls!
o A thumpin’ Chiptune-inspired soundtrack!
o Special Chiptune Guest Star Bubblyfish!
o Mind-melting challenges!
o Revealing cut scenes!

– BIT.TRIP VOID continues CommanderVideo’s epic journey with:

o Mid-level checkpoints!
o Epic boss battles!
o A rockin’ Chiptune-inspired soundtrack!
o Special Chiptune guest star Nullsleep!
o Synaesthetic music/art/gameplay interaction!
o Hyper-realistic retro cut scenes!

– BIT.TRIP RUNNER marks the first fully character-based adventure for CommanderVideo with:

o Rhythm-based action platforming!
o Boss battles against robotic terrors!
o 50+ challenges!
o Classic NES-style controls!
o A pounding Chiptune-inspired soundtrack!
o Special Chiptune guest star Anamanaguchi!
o New friends for CommanderVideo!

– BIT.TRIP FATE is the penultimate chapter in the six-part BIT.TRIP series and will leave you wondering what’s next.

o Collect power-ups to call on CommanderVideo’s friends for powerful shot upgrades!
o A chiptune-inspired dubstep soundtrack helps bring the action to a whole new level!
o Video game worlds collide with appearances from Super Meat Boy and Mr. Robotube!
o Chipmusic artist Minusbaby helps set the tone with a special guest appearance!

– The BIT.TRIP series comes full-circle with BIT.TRIP FLUX: CommanderVideo’s final adventure.

o New power-ups including the full screen paddle!
o New beat types including Avoid Blobs!
o Mid-level checkpoints!
o Classic BIT.TRIP BEAT gameplay now with all the modes including the new Meta Mode!
o Bit Shifter returns as the Chiptune guest star!

BIT.TRIP COMPLETE and BIT.TRIP SAGA have been rated “E” for Everyone with Mild Fantasy Violence by the Entertainment Software Rating Board (ESRB). More information about Aksys Games and the BIT.TRIP seriescan be found at and

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Hey, Grognards- Panzer Corps is releasing July 11

The most recent newsletter from Slitherine (rival developer to Gryphondoor and Huphlepuph) states that Panzer Corps is releasing July 11. The game looks like a very close approximation of the classic Panzer General with some promised refinements to gameplay and balance. I loved SSI’s Five Star General games- all of ’em- and I love this kind of approachable, easy to dig into PC wargaming. Fingers crossed for low specs that won’t embarass my aging laptop!

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Turmoil Games releases horror-adventure Alpha Polaris for PC

Now this sounds pretty cool. For those of you who may not be aware, I’m a horror fanatic. And by horror I don’t mean all that post-Fangoria torture porn garbage and I’m not much of a fan of the incredibly inane J-horror movement aside from a couple of exemplary examples. I like classic horror richer in atmosphere than in schlock. And after playing through the screaming disappointment that was Shadows of the Damned, I’m primed for a good, spooky game that doesn’t fall back on dick jokes to provide entertainment. Finnish company Turmoil Games sent us a press release for Alpha Polaris an interesting-looking point-and-click game that sounds like it’s taking a couple of pages from Lovecraft as well as John Carpenter’s version of The Thing. This might be worth checking out. They’ve got a demo, it’s just a question if my antique laptop can run it or not. Press follows.

Turmoil Games, in partnership with Berlin-based Just A Game, is proud to
announce the launch of Alpha Polaris, a point & click horror adventure
game for Windows PC.

The game is available now as a digital download from
A localized German retail version is available from Greenwood
Entertainment. Other localizations are soon to follow.

In the midst of the snowfields of Greenland lies Alpha Polaris, an
American oil research station. High above, the ion storm of the century is
gathering, bringing about a strange intermixing of reality and night
terrors. It is up to Rune Knudsen, a Norwegian biologist, to take on a
desperate struggle against fear and death, and to face the primordial
force lurking beyond the veiled sky.

Main features:
* Mature, character-driven storyline
* Streamlined point & click interface
* Puzzles are an integral part of the story
* 3D characters in beautiful, pre-rendered scenes
* 1280 x 800 widescreen resolution
* Expressive, hand-drawn dialogue portraits
* Atmospheric soundscape including original soundtrack

Platform: Windows PC
Genre: Point & Click Adventure
Developer: Turmoil Games
Publisher: Just A Game

Turmoil Games is an independent Finnish game studio founded in 2008 by a
diverse group of media professionals. The team strives to combine years of
experience in academic game studies, graphic design and dramatic arts in
pushing the envelope in gaming and interactive storytelling.

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Team Fortress 2 Goes Free-to-Play

If you’re the one gamer in 10,000 that is interested in playing Team Fortress 2, but not enough so that you’ve actually been willing to spend money on it, then you’ll be glad to know it has officially gone free-to-play. Going forward Valve intends for the game to support itself purely through micro transactions.

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Conquest of Nerath in Review

The new Dungeons and Dragons board game is Conquest of Nerath and my favorable review of it is up at

Wizards of the Coast has kind of been on a roll lately with very good and highly accessible board game explorations of the D&D brand. I liked both Castle Ravenloft and Wrath of Ashardalon a lot, and I found that they were cleaner and more direct than other popular dungeoncrawl-themed board games out there. Some folks didn’t care for their simplicity or their streamlined qualities, but the games were clearly intended to be approachable and easy to play. Conquest of Nerath is like this too. It’s a fairly basic Axis and Allies-style “dudes on a map” game with some added detail in unit differentiation and faction-specific event cards. There’s also a small but effective questing mechanic.

It’s not innovative, groundbreaking, or incredibly original. But it totally works, succeeding as a traditional example of this kind of game that eschews the newfangled mechanical bells and whistles of its peers. This is a game where you should be chucking the dice into the boxlid, not clucking over how clever the resource management scheme is. It knows what it wants to do, and if you want to do the same thing it wants to then you’re going to have some fun with this title.

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Columbia Games finally reprints Slapshot

After announcing it something like five or six years ago Columbia Games, venerable publisher of great block wargames like Hammer of the Scots, is finally reprinting Slapshot, a light n’ nasty hockey card game that’s been out of print forever. I’ve never actually played it because I’ve never so much as seen a copy of it, and aftermarket prices kept me away from it. I’m looking forward to checking it out, I’m not much of a sports fan but I do like a good sports-themed board game and this looks fun. $24.95 retail, which is very reasonable for this kind of game.

Slapshot is a wheeling, dealing game for hockey fans. Each player assumes the role of team manager. The object is to skillfully manage your team into the playoffs and then win the championship. During the regular season you can improve your team with drafts and trades, but injuries can upset the best of plans. Ultimately, your skill as manager determines if your team wins or loses.

Slapshot includes 54 zany hockey players like Slash Gordon, Puck Rogers, Ian Jury, Cheap Shot, Le Goon, and Jack the Tripper.

Slapshot is fast, furious, fun, and simple to play. Lace up your skates and checkout the game celebrated as the closing game each year at the World Boardgame Championships.

Slapshot was originally published in 1975 under the name Team by Gamma Two Games. The game was designed by Tom Dalgliesh, Lance Gutteridge, Ron Gibson, John Gordon. Slapshot has been printed under license several times since.

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