This time next week, I’ll be at E3. I’m both looking forward to the show and not at the same time as while I love seeing Bill, Todd, Danielle, Mitch and so many others, it’s a lot of work, I don’t get a lot of sleep and there’s only so much social interaction I can take. See, I’m an outgoing guy, but I have a finite pool of sociability (if that’s a word) and as the show goes on, the pool gets drained and never refilled to the point where I’m pretty much spent by the end of the show. Last year, my last appointment was to see the new Kane and Lynch game. The developers were as spent as I was and I think if I had suggested that we all just exchanged cards, pretended the meeting took place and instead split a six pack, they would have agreed.
The usual spate of pre-E3 announcement have been made, with more to come, I’m sure. Some of them, like Darksiders II, I’m extremely excited for, some of them, like Colonial Marines, I’m less excited for.
That’s not to say I won’t keep an eye on Aliens, as I like Gearbox and want to see what they do with the property, it’s just that right now I don’t know enough about the game, other than Sega’s PR department apparently has plenty of money to blow on doll heads and plastic guns…
The Darksiders 2 announcement got me thinking about other things I’d love to see at E3 but haven’t been announced, either because it’s not time yet, or it isn’t happening at all. If these things do end up getting announced, consider me a prophetic genius. If they don’t, feel free to steal my ideas. I don’t need payment beyond a review copy.
A New Luigi’s Mansion Game
I didn’t play Luigi’s Mansion when it launched alongside the GameCube, instead borrowing it from a friend some time afterwards, but when I did play it, I enjoyed the hell out of it. I still don’t understand why, with two different pointer-based consoles from Nintendo, Luigi hasn’t gone back to his ghost busting efforts, but it needs to stop, like now. The Wii is on its way out, but if Project Cafe is going to have hi-def graphics and Wiimote support, make another Luigi’s Mansion, like toot sweet.
A New Paper Mario Game
I loved, loved, loved Super Paper Mario and the papery graphical style would look awesome on a fancy, new 3D display. Sure, Nintendo has said that there is a new Paper Mario game coming to the 3DS, but they’ve said a lot of things about planned software for the 3DS and so far that, and two bucks will get you a cup of coffee. Trees are overrated Nintendo, get some paper all up in this Mushroom Kingdom!
An Interesting Western RPG That Isn’t Made By BioWare or Bethesda
Most of the western RPG’s I play are made by BioWare or Bethesda. Hell, all of the western RPG’s I play are made by BioWare or Bethesda. I like those shops just fine, but I’d like to play something made by someone else. Oh, I know there are other RPG’s out there, but it’s not like Gothic 4 was bringing in awesome reviews. I want something that’s a) western, b) good and c) not made by BioWare or Bethesda. I’m seeing Risen when I’m at E3, and that game interests me greatly. It’s got a cool, pirate meets voodoo vibe, it’s set in a world that’s been flooded and overrun with monsters and it’s not made by BioWare or Bethesda. Here’s hoping it’s good.
Whatever the Next Burnout Game Is
Sure, Split/Second was great, but Burnout is my favorite racing game and I want to see the next one so that I can rest easily knowing it isn’t going to be poo.
The New SSX Game
I’d like to get the disappointment and heartbreak over now so that I don’t hold out hope for an upgraded version of SSX Tricky. Just rip the band-aid off already EA!
LucasArts Adventure Games Remade for the iPad
There are some damn fine adventure games out for the iPad, but come on, how awesome would it be to play Day of the Tentacle, Grim Fandango, Sam and Max Hit the Road and Full Throttle while waiting for the dentist to see you? So awesome. That’s how awesome.
She says she can. This needs to happen.
Bill Punch Someone
Bill teeters dangerously close to physical violence every E3, always a result of some non-gaming journalist show attendant like a Best Buy employee, or ITT Tech student getting in the way as he tries to do his job. Seeing how I’ll be staying with Bill for the length of the show, I’m pretty sure non-stop exposure to Mister Binky will be all that’s needed to push him over the edge and into beating some Walmart buyer into unconsciousness next to the Capcom booth.
A New Sly Cooper Game
Yeah, yeah, yeah, InFAMOUS 2, blah, blah, blah. Sly Cooper is where it’s at, so let’s stop pretending with emo-lightning boy and instead get Sucker Punch back to making games about thieving raccoons.
Something New and Original
Ironic, I know, given that so far all I’ve hoped for is remakes and sequels. Sequels are the name of the game, I understand this. It’s a daunting proposition to spend a ton of money on a new IP in today’s gaming landscape. That being said, I’d like to be surprised by something at E3 that represents something new and original, or at least a new and original take on something that already exists. I know it’s asking a lot, but there have to be some original ideas out there.
Rock Band: Mott the Hoople
All the young dudes!