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Assassin’s Creed Revelations Teaser

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UbiSoft yesterday released this teaser trailer for AC: Revelations which doesn’t show much but tells you that this trailer is really just a way to let you know that the real trailer will drop on June 6th.

Thanks for that.

UbiSoft did issue the following PR as well:

Assassin’s Creed Revelations follows master assassin Ezio Auditore as he walks in the footsteps of his legendary mentor, Altaïr, on a journey to recover five ancient seals that hold the keys to the future of the Assassins brotherhood. It is a perilous path – one that will take Ezio to Constantinople, the heart of the Ottoman Empire, where a growing army of Templars threatens to destabilize the region.

Assassin’s Creed Revelations is set to release on the Xbox 360 video game and entertainment system from Microsoft, the PlayStation 3 computer entertainment system and Windows PC this November.

• Hone the deadly art of assassination – As Ezio Auditore, wield the lethal skills of a wiser, more efficient assassin. Armed with a new arsenal of weapons and abilities including the hookblade, bomb crafting and a heightened Eagle Sense, you can kill with death-dealing proficiency.
• Herald the return of a legend – Assassin’s Creed Revelations features the return of Altaïr as a playable character, the hero of the original Assassin’s Creed.
• Journey to the Constantinople –Explore picturesque settings, from Masyaf, the mountain stronghold of the Assassins during the Third Crusade to the vibrant and exotic Constantinople, the jewel of the Ottoman Empire in the 16th Century. Navigate crowded streets and vistas, through a cauldron of cultures as Constantinople comes to life.
• Meet new players to the Assassins Creed lore –Encounter memorable personalities, including fellow master assassin Yusuf Tazim, Prince Suleiman, destined to become one of the greatest monarchs in history, and Sofia Sorto, a simple woman who vies for Ezio’s heart.
• Test your skills as an assassin against your friends – the acclaimed online multiplayer experience returns, refined and expanded with more modes, more enthralling maps and new characters

Consumers who pre-order Assassin’s Creed Revelations at a U.S. GameStop location will receive an exclusive Penny Arcade poster. (limited quantities while supplies last.)

Alice: Madness Returns Creepy Combat Trailer

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As creepy as I find this game, I’m getting more and more interested in it as time goes on, simply from the visual style alone. The enemy design looks to be completely off the wall and I love the little touches like the wake of butterflies when Alice dodges and the fact that her appearance changes while in Hysteria mode. Hopefully the gameplay will be on par with the visual style and we’ll have good third person romp on our hands.

Don’t Shoot the Food – Dirt 3 Edition

No High Scores

I think we all have games that we’re not good at but wish we were and for whatever reason, lack of skill, lack of time, old age, we just can’t move past our inabilities. For me, it’s racing games. I’ve mentioned before that I play one and only one racing game and that’s Burnout. I’ve tried Forza and PGR and while I appreciate their attention to detail, I never do well enough to move past the first racing tier and I spend all of my time racing the same crappy beginner’s cars. It’s hard to compete against the big boys when you’re stuck in a Golf. I don’t care how souped up it is.

Burnout though, has always been different. As an arcade racer, it’s a little more lenient. Plus, there are plenty of events that rely on your ability to run others off of the road, rather than simply drive well, so that I can proceed even if I’m not the best racer out there. Of course, once you get to the point where the game forces you to race, my lack of skills show themselves and it’s pretty much all over for me, but usually by then I’ve gotten far enough in the game to feel like I got my money’s worth. Burnout Paradise was the best in this regard and I managed to obtain my A license before hitting the brick wall of racing incompetence. For me, that’s a pretty good haul.

So with this week’s release of Dirt 3, a game I’m sure I’d love if was able to play it, I figured I’d throw racing a little food love. With the warm weather coming and a racing game set in the dirt and muck, it seemed a good time to break out a recipe for Mud Pie…

As a lover of chocolate, coffee and pie, Mud Pie is the perfect combination. Unfortunately, I’m the only mud pie aficionado in my house, so my love of Mud Pie is confined to trips to Cold Stone Creamery. It’s probably for the best that there aren’t more people in my house that like this particular dessert as it’s not seasonal, so I could conceivably make it every week, which I probably would. Exercise can only do so much, and I’m pretty sure a mud pie a week would qualify as “too much”.

Nevertheless, here’s a pretty simple mud pie recipe. There’s a little more pre-assembly work to do than usual, but all in all, it’s not bad. Plus, there’s minimal baking time which means your kitchen won’t get too hot in the summer. What you gain in climate control though, you lose in portability as ice cream pies don’t fare too well as picnic items. Oh well. Best to just eat it quickly and then make another once you get home.

Coffee Mud Pie with Oreo Crust – Pie by Ken Haedrich

Crumb Crust
1. 3 cups coarsely broken Oreo cookies
2. Pinch of cinnamon
3. 2 Tbl unsalted butter, melted
4. 2 to 3 tsp milk

Warm Mocha Sauce
1. 1/2 cup heavy or whipping cream
2. 1 Tbl instant espresso or coffee crystals
3. 2 Tbl unsalted butter, cut into 1/2 inch pieces.
4. 1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
5. 1 Tbl light corn syrup
6. 1/2 tsp vanilla extract

1. Oreo crumb crust.
2. 1/2 gallon coffee ice cream – the reality is that you could do this pie with any ice cream and it would still be good, even if it’s not mud pie. If your family isn’t big on coffee, go full on Oreo and do it with Cookies and Cream ice cream, or Cookie Dough. Or, get really crazy and do a black cherry chocolate chip pie. Damn. Who’s hungry?
3. 2 cups coarsely broken Oreo cookies
4. Warm Mocha Sauce at room temperature, but still pourable

Cooking Steps
Crumb Crust
1. Preheat the oven to 325.
2. Pulse the cookies and cinnamon in a food processor until you have fine crumbs. Add the crumbs to a bowl and add the melted butter. Mix everything together until well mixed. Add the milk and mix until well mixed.
3. Press the crumb mixture into a 9 or 9.5 inch pie pan. Completely cover the bottom of the pan with the mixture and press it halfway up the sides of the pan. Try to make the thickness as uniform as possible.
4. Refrigerate the crust for 5 to 10 minutes.
5. Bake on the center rack for 6 minutes. Cool completely on a wire rack and refrigerate for at least 10 minutes before filling.

Warm Mocha Sauce
1. Bring the cream, coffee and butter to a simmer in a small saucepan over medium heat. Whisk well to dissolve the coffee. Remove it from the heat, let it sit for 2 minutes and then stir in the chocolate chips, whisking until the chocolate is fully melted. Whisk in the corn syrup and vanilla extract.
2. If you’re not using the sauce right away, let it cool and then refrigerate. Microwave on low, or warm over low heat to warm it back up.

1. 15 minutes before you’re going to assemble the pie, place the ice cream in the fridge.
2. Put half of the ice cream in the crust, pressing it into the crust, firmly but carefully. Be careful not to crack the crust.
3. Put the pie and the rest of the ice cream back in the freezer for ten minutes.
4. Spread the crushed cookies all over the ice cream, pressing it into the ice cream. Spoon about half of the sauce over the cookies. Place the pie back in the freezer for ten minutes.
5. Mound the ice cream over the cookies and sauce. Try to make it as dome-like as possible. Cover the pie with the rest of the sauce. Cover the pie with loosely tented foil and place in the freezer for at least an hour.

Still hungry? Check out the Don’t Shoot the Food archive.

FEAR 3 Contractions Trailer

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Another new FEAR 3 trailer is upon us, this time detailing the new Contractions co-op mode which sees four players in a survival mode fighting evil things. There’s something else about Alma and contractions and weird fog but I have no idea what they’re talking about. Let’s hope the gameplay is good because every trailer of this game makes the graphics and animations appear…rough.

Bloodrayne: Betrayal Trailer

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I’m not ashamed to say that I played Bloodrayne when it was out. Ok, maybe I’m a little ashamed. It wasn’t the worst action game I’ve ever played and it did have two different breast related cheat codes which should make it unique in at least one regard. I never sunk so low as to watch the movies, so at least there’s that. This trailer for the upcoming XBLA / PSN side scrolling slash ’em up is enough to kindle my interest in everyone’s favorite half-human, half-vampire redhead. Between the art style, the scoring and the slaughter, consider me officially interested.